As I’m struggling emotionally through the next leap in my daughters gradual parenting time schedule.
I was tasked to work on acceptance and forgiveness as my councilor is on Vacation . As I was pondering these two topics, I came to realize that even though custody court has been complete for 8 months, and my daughter is now 15 months I still have not accepted the current custody agreement. Then after diving deeper into the feelings, I realized that I haven’t allowed myself to accept myself, who I truly am deep within my soul.
My apologies in advance for a moment of selfishness…
I’m an amazing person and have accomplished many things in my life, school degrees even though I have a learning disability, having my own home and cars, starting a retirement fund to ensure that I can take care of myself when I retire, taking care of mental health on a daily/weekly basis, starting my blog page that I have been thinking about for over two years, starting a signal momma support group to help all single mothers including myself. I’m caring, loving, empathic, an amazing mother, friend, granddaughter, and daughter occasionally (working on being better).
Although I’m able to verbally and physically can write about these things about myself, I don’t believe them in my heart and soul that they are true. That is where my radical acceptance needs to begin. After searching the internet to understand acceptance and how to go about doing it or how it looks, I found this article in Psychology today, The Healing Power of Radical Acceptance, very insightful.
The idea of accepting what is becomes so disconcerting, especially when there’s deep pain attached to an event or circumstance. Acceptance doesn’t mean resignation, that the circumstance goes away, or that we necessarily feel better about it. The impact and emotions it evokes is present irrespective of whether we accept it or not. The question is whether we’re layering on the pain and further intensifying and exacerbating what already exists.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/being-your-best-self/202203/the-healing-power-radical-acceptance#:~:text=When%20you%20accept%2C%20you%20experience,life’s%20most%20difficult%20experiences%20occur.
This statement was very powerful but frustrating for me as I thought acceptance would help release my mind body and soul of the frustrations, hurts and triggers that I struggle with every day.
What this is telling me that I have to work daily routine of accepting things that I can’t change and focus on things that I can change. To me this is extremely frustrating and relieving at the same time, it shows that there is hope but its going to be a daily routine in which some continuous days I struggle with putting the dirty dishes in the dish washer. I see that I have to add this information to my tool box and utilize it every day.
Resources: ~Psychology today Article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/being-your-best-self/202203/the-healing-power-radical-acceptance#:~:text=When%20you%20accept%2C%20you%20experience,life’s%20most%20difficult%20experiences%20occur. ~Photo by Ron Lach on Pexels.com
Motherhood & Mental Health 